Do you like yourself? Why or why not?
This question really got to me. I had never actually sat down and thought about it. I am always so caught up in my everyday life and what other people think about me that I never really assess about how I feel about myself. You may be wondering if it even matters. Well, it does. Making the decision to love yourself is the most important decision you will make in your life.
If I had to guess, I’d say 9/10 people have self-esteem issues. You may think you’re alone but even the most seemingly confident (or even downright cocky) people have issues with themselves that go much deeper than what you see on the surface. These issues can stem from fear of rejection, looking foolish, criticism, not living up to expectations, and appearance flaws (like obesity, aging, acne, etc). This can cause one to lack self-esteem, will power, work ethic, courage, generosity, and character. When you walk into a room with unfamiliar faces are you genuinely interested in getting to know each person or are you self-conscious? After conversations with people are you thinking about what that person said or overanalyzing every little thing that you said? Having these problems can slowly eat away at you until one day you have to face yourself and ask the question: “Do I like myself?”
If you lack self-love, respect, and understanding, it inhibits your ability to make healthy choices. You may make decisions that compromise your self worth. You have to know yourself as well as accept yourself, in order to have the courage to follow your intuitive guidance. If you’re constantly unsure of yourself or putting yourself down, you cloud that and you’re incapable of taking action to get what you want out of life. You have to be able to be sure of yourself and what you want to that you can set clear goals and have the courage to pursue them.
To love ourselves, we must understand ourselves. And this requires giving ourselves a lot of attention. Tune in to what makes you happy, sad, anxious, what you’re scared of, and where those fears stem from. You have to face those fears, understand them, and let them go in order to move on and love yourself. You can only rely on other people for so long. Relationships are great, but not loving yourself can ruin every single one. You have to look at yourself and realize how amazing you are. There is not one in the entire world with the same passions, desires, and dreams as yours. It’s so easy to wish you had someone else’s creativity or intelligence or looks, while ignoring all of the great things about yourself. The world already has what other people have to offer. You have so many qualities that are irreplaceable- even the bad ones. You have to own them.
“No one is you and that is your power.”
So how do you develop a healthy self-esteem? First, you have to do some introspection. For me, I have to be able to clear my head and stop thinking about every day issues in order to focus on deeper issues. I usually do this through exercise or meditation. I think that everyone should cut out however much time you need each day to meditate. Meditate, even for just ten minutes a day, and let your mind wander. What do you like? Dislike? What separates you from your family and friends? Do your relationships meet your needs? Are you capable of meeting those needs yourself or do you rely on others? I like to mediatate then immediately write in my journal. Once my mind is already in that state, I find that my thoughts flow even more when I begin to write them down. Then, take notice of situations that make you uncomfortable for being yourself. In those situations, be yourself anyways. You may feel self-conscious or even embarrassed, but I promise that no one judges you as hard as you judge yourself. Acknowledge the fears of being judged or criticized then let them go. You are unique and have so much to offer to the world around you. It’s not fair to everyone else if your hide your true self away just so you can blend in and be comfortable. The world needs what you have to offer.
Being your own person or “finding yourself” can be a lonely thing at times. Not everyone will agree with you. Some may even laugh at you. That's okay. The people who stick around and support you are the people worthy of being in your life. People will come and go but at the end of the day, you have to face yourself and ask yourself if your life feels full. Don’t let people make you think that their presence makes your life valid. Not being true to yourself in order to stay comfortable and keep people in your life will only end in disappointment for you and in your relationships.
Don’t let people make you think that your passions are unimportant or irrelevant. They’re yours, therefore, they are important. Be your own inspiration. Do what you want to do and what you feel you need to in order to wake up every morning and inspire yourself. Be grateful for what you have and embrace the opportunities that make you feel that you’re staying true to yourself. When you love yourself, you are able to live in the moment. You are able to enjoy the moment and make meaningful connections with the world around you.
I think that people shy away from this because they feel “selfish”. Stop being afraid of anything that helps you. It’s not selfish to do things that embrace being your true self. What’s selfish is keeping your true self, emotions, and beliefs hidden from the world. So many more people can relate to you than you realize. But they’ll never have the courage to be themselves if you don't.
Love yourself. Embrace yourself. Stay true to youself. Find yourself. Understand yourself. Ask yourself: do I like myself? Why and why not? Make a list. Look at the things that you don’t like. Change what you can, embrace what you can’t. Once you start feeling good about yourself, your life starts changing rapidly because you find yourself taking actions to make changes for the better. This can be terrifying, but it’s worth it. I felt the need to write this because I think that a lot of people my age are in this stage in their lives. Things are changing- fast. And the decisions you make at this time are crucial. Will you have the courage to love yourself regardless of what other think or will you stay comfortable?
xx Kate
This question really got to me. I had never actually sat down and thought about it. I am always so caught up in my everyday life and what other people think about me that I never really assess about how I feel about myself. You may be wondering if it even matters. Well, it does. Making the decision to love yourself is the most important decision you will make in your life.
If I had to guess, I’d say 9/10 people have self-esteem issues. You may think you’re alone but even the most seemingly confident (or even downright cocky) people have issues with themselves that go much deeper than what you see on the surface. These issues can stem from fear of rejection, looking foolish, criticism, not living up to expectations, and appearance flaws (like obesity, aging, acne, etc). This can cause one to lack self-esteem, will power, work ethic, courage, generosity, and character. When you walk into a room with unfamiliar faces are you genuinely interested in getting to know each person or are you self-conscious? After conversations with people are you thinking about what that person said or overanalyzing every little thing that you said? Having these problems can slowly eat away at you until one day you have to face yourself and ask the question: “Do I like myself?”
If you lack self-love, respect, and understanding, it inhibits your ability to make healthy choices. You may make decisions that compromise your self worth. You have to know yourself as well as accept yourself, in order to have the courage to follow your intuitive guidance. If you’re constantly unsure of yourself or putting yourself down, you cloud that and you’re incapable of taking action to get what you want out of life. You have to be able to be sure of yourself and what you want to that you can set clear goals and have the courage to pursue them.
To love ourselves, we must understand ourselves. And this requires giving ourselves a lot of attention. Tune in to what makes you happy, sad, anxious, what you’re scared of, and where those fears stem from. You have to face those fears, understand them, and let them go in order to move on and love yourself. You can only rely on other people for so long. Relationships are great, but not loving yourself can ruin every single one. You have to look at yourself and realize how amazing you are. There is not one in the entire world with the same passions, desires, and dreams as yours. It’s so easy to wish you had someone else’s creativity or intelligence or looks, while ignoring all of the great things about yourself. The world already has what other people have to offer. You have so many qualities that are irreplaceable- even the bad ones. You have to own them.
“No one is you and that is your power.”
So how do you develop a healthy self-esteem? First, you have to do some introspection. For me, I have to be able to clear my head and stop thinking about every day issues in order to focus on deeper issues. I usually do this through exercise or meditation. I think that everyone should cut out however much time you need each day to meditate. Meditate, even for just ten minutes a day, and let your mind wander. What do you like? Dislike? What separates you from your family and friends? Do your relationships meet your needs? Are you capable of meeting those needs yourself or do you rely on others? I like to mediatate then immediately write in my journal. Once my mind is already in that state, I find that my thoughts flow even more when I begin to write them down. Then, take notice of situations that make you uncomfortable for being yourself. In those situations, be yourself anyways. You may feel self-conscious or even embarrassed, but I promise that no one judges you as hard as you judge yourself. Acknowledge the fears of being judged or criticized then let them go. You are unique and have so much to offer to the world around you. It’s not fair to everyone else if your hide your true self away just so you can blend in and be comfortable. The world needs what you have to offer.
Being your own person or “finding yourself” can be a lonely thing at times. Not everyone will agree with you. Some may even laugh at you. That's okay. The people who stick around and support you are the people worthy of being in your life. People will come and go but at the end of the day, you have to face yourself and ask yourself if your life feels full. Don’t let people make you think that their presence makes your life valid. Not being true to yourself in order to stay comfortable and keep people in your life will only end in disappointment for you and in your relationships.
Don’t let people make you think that your passions are unimportant or irrelevant. They’re yours, therefore, they are important. Be your own inspiration. Do what you want to do and what you feel you need to in order to wake up every morning and inspire yourself. Be grateful for what you have and embrace the opportunities that make you feel that you’re staying true to yourself. When you love yourself, you are able to live in the moment. You are able to enjoy the moment and make meaningful connections with the world around you.
I think that people shy away from this because they feel “selfish”. Stop being afraid of anything that helps you. It’s not selfish to do things that embrace being your true self. What’s selfish is keeping your true self, emotions, and beliefs hidden from the world. So many more people can relate to you than you realize. But they’ll never have the courage to be themselves if you don't.
Love yourself. Embrace yourself. Stay true to youself. Find yourself. Understand yourself. Ask yourself: do I like myself? Why and why not? Make a list. Look at the things that you don’t like. Change what you can, embrace what you can’t. Once you start feeling good about yourself, your life starts changing rapidly because you find yourself taking actions to make changes for the better. This can be terrifying, but it’s worth it. I felt the need to write this because I think that a lot of people my age are in this stage in their lives. Things are changing- fast. And the decisions you make at this time are crucial. Will you have the courage to love yourself regardless of what other think or will you stay comfortable?
xx Kate